This is my 500th post. I’ve been thinking for weeks on what to write and honestly, I can’t think of much. And I’ve been pretty down this week.
Now before I get some “anonymous” letter in the mail telling me I need to count my blessings and be happy, etc., I want to assure you that I know I am EXTREMELY blessed. I am so grateful to have Mark here and alive and I know I’ve got the most amazing love. I wish everyone could have it.
But according to my therapist, after a crisis situation, it is very common for a week after to feel tired, depressed, anxious and not yourself and that’s exactly how I’ve felt. It’s not that I’m hating life or angry or bitter or anything and I definitely know how lucky I am to have Mark in my life. It’s just that I’m feeling just not myself.
I haven’t been sleeping well at all. I’m very worried if I don’t hear Mark snoring and if I don’t hear him, I panic and reach over to make sure he’s still breathing. Sounds crazy, I know, but if you have a terminally ill spouse, you’ll know exactly what I’m talking about.
So, I’m tired, anxious, worried, etc. I’m not myself. But, knowing that it’s normal and actually healthy for right now makes me feel a ton better.
I know I haven’t been commenting as much on blogs. I will get better…..I promise.
Switching gears here
Knowing this is my 500th post, I’ve been thinking about when I started blogging. This was back in August 2007. I mostly started blogging because some of my friends from the NW board were leaving the board and mostly blogging. I wanted to stay in touch with them so I started blogging too.
Little did I know how much it would change my life. I started out with about 20 blogs. I now have 139 that I watch. I’ve meant so many wonderful women going through the exact same thing as me. I’ve talked to some of you on the phone. I’ve personally e-mailed some of you. I’ve exchanged Christmas cards, gifts, etc. with some and these are people I’ve never even met. I’ve thought of you guys more than I do my own family. I pray for all of you and I don’t know what I would do without you guys. No matter what, you guys are always there for support and love and I can usually find someone who has some advice for any situation.
And it all started with just a little blog.
Thank you for being a part of my life.
Birthday Fun
4 years ago
15 comments:
Happy 500th post...wow!!
I'm praying God gives you some peace. I can only imagine how hard it is with Mark being so sick. Praying for his health, as well.
((HUGS))
Happy 500th post!!
Actually, I don't have a terminally ill spouse, but I do that to my kids. Even the older ones. Granted, they don't snore, but if I walk in to where they are sleeping, I check to make sure they are breathing. And I check Caelyn all the time. So I don't think it's crazy at all. We love them, and wouldn't know what to do without them. They are our lives, our world, our loves... our everything.
I have to say that I feel honored to be a part of your life, even if only through the blog world, and NW. You are such an amazing, inspirational person. I love to read what you have to say. I pray for you and Mark daily, and you are always in my thoughts.
Hope Mark is feeling better and better.
(((HUGS)))
500??? You go girl!!! I need to catch up! LOL
You have ever right to be tired and sad and scared honey. It really bothers me that people send mail to you. Do these people have ill spouses? I bet you anything they don't. Do they suffer from infertility on top of that? Probably not! That really upsets me. I wish I knew who this person was. They obviously need to get a life because all they are doing is living in yours.
Love you girl! So very much!
Kami
HAPPY 500th post sweetie! I love reading your post, so keep them up :)
Always praying for you and yours :)
Love,
Tiff
What a wonderful 500th post :) congrats on the accomplishment, and hope your day goes a little bit better!
happy 500th! im VERY glad you started blogging and am grateful for our friendship or..blogship? whatever you want to call it!!
500?! Holy macaroni! I'm so glad to have you as a blog friend AND a real-life friend (I can say that since we've met, right?). I remember the first time you came over to my blog from LFCA to offer encouragement when I was having a hard day. I'm thankful for you!
Hoping you have a better week ahead and that Mark continues to do better.
Happy 500!
I hear you chickie!
Awww. I have to agree, I didn't know what I was getting into when I started blogging either - it has been WONDERFUL! I never feel alone as I make my way through this crazy IF/pregnancy/parenting business. What a blessing.
Hope you get back to feeling like yourself soon.
Woo Hoo Just look at this as another milestone that you have reached and are over now... :) Good Luck with Mark too... its good to hear he is doing better
Wow 500 posts that is awesome!
I did the same thing to my dh when he was sick it is natural I know exactly what you are talking about.
PS it was the nw board that got me blogging too.
Happy 500th post!! Damn that's a lot;0 I can't believe you follow so many blogs...that's dedication!! I'm so happy I "met" you. I hope everything gets better. I'm sending some prayers your way!! ((HUGS))
What a neat post Tammy. That is such a neat way to acknowledge it and you are so sweet!!!!
Oh and like DaniKel, I check AJ all the time to make sure he is okay when he is sleeping.
I know your time is coming Tammy.. I just know it. You are not a quitter and you are such a wonderful person and deserve the best.
WOW 500? Good for you! honeslty, that is so amazing to me and I'm sure you're whole life really has changed because of it. I'm a firm believer in writing down your thoughts, dreams, and wishes. It's very theraputic and look at who all you've met along your journey.
Congratulations
and here's to many more ("cheers")
Sarah.
Happy 500th post! It's so strange the places blogging takes. Wonderful too.
I'm sorry you're feeling down. I know what you mean. It's not that your miserable but it sure would be great if things were different.
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