A Look Back at 2021

Covid. A New Business. A Widow’s Retreat. Writing A Book.
Looking back at 2021, things happened that I never would have expected. I never would have thought I would have contracted Covid. I never would have thought I would have started a new business with Scentsy and earned awards. I never would have thought I would go to a widows retreat, alone, miles away. I never would have thought I would become an official author.
Yet, here I am. I’ve done it all.
I couldn’t be more proud of myself.
It wasn’t an easy year by any means. It’s hard to explain how even two years later, grief can be so difficult. Grief will always be a part of our journey. 2021 would have been our 20th wedding anniversary. I have no doubt that if Mark was here we would have made it. We had a marriage that went through so much but we stuck together. Celebrating 20 years was not something I wanted to celebrate alone. But I did. And I survived.
Hannah and I will always struggle with grief. We will always miss Mark. And that’s okay.
Yet, despite still grieving heavily, we had quite a year. Hannah and I both struggled with Covid. It took almost 3 weeks for me to feel myself again. Hannah–she was sick for a couple days. But we made it. We survived. We thank God we did. We know many people we weren’t so lucky, including my uncle and sister-in-law whom we miss deeply.
After recovering from Covid, I needed something to keep my mind busy. Scentsy was always something Mark really enjoyed. I decided to join as something to do. I never would have guessed that I would be one of only 14% of consultants who hit the Scensational Start Level 2. It continues to be something that I enjoy.
In the summer, I did something I never thought I would do. I went to Florida to a Widows Retreat. All. By. Myself. I was absolutely terrified! It took so much courage for me to do that. It was completely out of my comfort zone. But I was so glad I took that step. I went there a broken and lonely widow but I came back feeling healed, strong and ready to keep moving forward and doing what was best for Hannah and I.
What am I missing?
Oh, yeah! The book!
It was always a dream of mine to write a book. Mark really pushed me to do it. But the timing never felt right. I was an exhausted caregiver and mother to a toddler. The last thing I felt I could do was take on writing a book. But when Mark passed, I knew it was time. I also knew why I didn’t feel the timing was right before. God’s hand was all over Mark’s passing and I needed to include that story. I listened to God and I was so glad I did. Everything fell into place with the book and it was published at a perfect time. I don’t know how many hands my book has fell into but if it falls into one person’s hands and helps them, that’s all that matters.
As I leave 2021, I feel peace. I feel hope. I feel joy. I miss Mark. I think of him every day. I always will. But I’m another year closer to seeing him again. I know I will see him again. In the meantime, my journey isn’t complete here. I don’t know what 2022 has in store for me but I’m ready for it.
Happy New Year to all my family and friends. I love you all!

Last day of school picture

Here is a last day of school picture for Hannah. You would think she would have been in a better mood :)

To compare the last day and first day, here is her first day picture:

Drawing the Elf on the Shelf at Christmastime

Here are a couple pictures from the Facebook school page

Trip to Green Bay to see Uncle Aaron in March

Quarantining in February

Here are some pictures from quarantine:

End of year testing

Misc. pictures

Quarter reports

During parent teacher conferences, we would get reports and graphs to show how Hannah was doing. During her last conferences the teacher had this to say:

“She is helpful in class and gets along great with the other kids. In fact, she is extremely helpful. You can always catch up with school work and teach that but you can’t teach being helpful and there for someone like she does. Part of my job is to make the kids into wonderful people but Hannah already started out being wonderful. I love having her. Thank you for sharing her with me”

This seriously made me cry. She’s definitely not perfect and has her faults but I’m so proud of her, especially how she is there for others. I’m also so glad we are a part of her school. I couldn’t ask for better support and teachers.

Happy birthday to Mom

Hannah made a birthday card for me. Very special